Why Neuroscience?

I came around to neuroscience - and more broadly, medicine - in a somewhat roundabout way. As with most of my endeavors, this calling stemmed from my endearment for my roots.

The Soma

Fear encapsulated much of my childhood. Having undocumented loved ones meant facing the reality that at any moment our family could be ripped apart - something that I had already endured. With deportation looming over our ghost-like existence, heightened anxiety and desolation was not uncommon. Although unfamiliar with higher education, these circumstances seemed to always point in the direction of immigration law. It was a combination of several realizations that steered my trajectory toward neuroscience. Caring for my grandmother with unbearable pain while navigating the U.S. health system while still learning English, witnessing as members in my community turned to drug use to cope with our material realities, and learning of the heightened risk for neurological issues amongst migrant farm workers.

During the second half of my high school experience, I too began to waver to the pressures of our socioeconomic status. That was when I was seen by a Latino physician for the first time. I was able to place my trust in Dr. Delgado, something that I could never do with previous providers - who often would leave the clinic before I could grow comfortable with them. A high school mentor of mine told me the day before graduation, "I don't see you as much of a scientist." While hurt, I could envision a path for me forward in Dr. Delgado, a path in which I could work towards addressing the behavioral and neurological needs of communities such as mine.

Action Potential: All-or-Nothing (Experiential Learning)

Eager to begin my work, I attended the Grey Matters Dawg Daze event. As I held a real human brain for the first time, I thought of the individual's selfless act. Now on the tail-end of my studies, there is still so much I don't know, that's the beauty of it and even in this moment I came to appreciate this beauty - all thanks to the donor. I became mesmerized by this student organization and their mission to make neuroscience accessible to people regardless of their background in science. I promptly chose to apply for their diversity director position, which I would be denied from. Although disheartening, I was able to turn my efforts towards establishing the outreach team - an initiative that would grant me rewarding memories. Through my work with Grey Matters, I spearheaded initiatives to

diversify the field of Neuroscience. There was something so uniquely special about teaching science in my Native tongue that cemented science and medical education as a cornerstone of my career endeavors. Formally self conscious of speaking about my identity and experiences in scientific spaces, these students challenged me to use my voice to invite others into a historically gatekept space. From there, I promised to carry myself regardless of the spaces I occupied.

Grey Matters allowed me the opportunity to shape science education in away that made it more relatable and vulnerable by cultivating a space where my peers and I could share neglected aspects of academia - the stress, imposter-syndrome, and uncertainties. While many of my science courses felt detached from the lived experiences of those that I one day wished to serve, my work was different. I often could connect with students from underrepresented backgrounds, utilizing neuroscience and education interweaved with my personal experiences allowed me to share deeply personal moments with these students. My work in Grey Matters introduced me to the concept of mentorship and reflecting on all my previous relationships - I knew that I wanted to make mentorship and outreach a cornerstone of my career as a future physician, educator, and advocate for those in my community.

Serving as Diversity Director for GM was one of my experiential learning activities, I would say I faced many challenges in launching many of my initiatives. Looking back on that, I think my inexperience as a first year played a large role. I often felt intimidated by the older members but with time I learned to lean on them and their expertise. With this, I found some more success in outreach and diversity recruitment and even hosted my first large scale event which I speak about at the end of this post.

This is my reflection from this experience, another thing that I learned (in tandem with Honors 394) is that community building takes lots of time and care, major themes that were covered in here. I'm completing my second experiential learning activity and find myself relearning this tenets in my research. Bottom line, anything that matters to you will take time and many trials which is a mindset I encourage now rather than fear.

Synapse: Making Connections

Neuropsychiatric disorders and stress were always something that were of interest to me, particularly because of the prominence of such health detriments within underserved communities. Because of this, I wished to play a role in further understanding the neural mechanisms about disorders. I joined the Golden Lab, here I felt as if I could combine my background in the social sciences with the scientific method and knowledge of biological systems that I was growing to address the gaps in this field.

Research though, was not without difficulty. Managing my work and collaborating with others in the lab proved a challenge. Once, lacking attention to detail caused me to mistakenly delete a postdoc's data for that day - I felt so guilty. I had to learn to let go of my pride and fear in interacting with those in higher positions of influence when apologizing. I had to practice more thoughtful experimental practices - appreciating the technique and careful pace of experimentation. Moreover, during the summer of my junior year while studying for the MCAT, I was rejected from a research grant that would've funded my first solo-project. It was difficult to not see this as a reflection of my poor work. I had poured hours and brain power into this proposal, energy that could have been used on studying for my MCAT.

It took me major perspective taking to

understand that this was not the case. To even have the opportunity to pursue research, period, was a dream of my younger self. That effort was never wasted; the skills I developed while crafting that project and balancing MCAT preparation have since strengthened my ability to tackle complex problems. Research, I’ve realized, is as much about persistence as it is about discovery.

Another exciting research opportunity presented itself when I was admitted into the 2023 cohort of the Neurological Surgery Summer Student Program. This was a program that I had always heard of - I was aware of its competitive application process as only 12 students across the U.S. were selected and the website reported that admits had a nearly perfect GPA, something that I certainly did not have at the time. Yet, I wanted to prove to myself that I could be a successful applicant. I aimed to increase my grades and wrote a strong personal statement that was accompanied by a gracious letter of recommendation from Dr. Theobald. To my surprise, I would be accepted and would soon find myself in the Stroke and Applied Neuroscience Center working under Dr. Levitt and Dr. Fillingham.

This experience exposed me to research that I never would've thought myself capable of. To paraphrase, I created computational fluid dynamic models of patients' cerebral aneurysms using brain imaging data. This in hopes of one day using these models as a clinical tool to assess treatment options for patients with such aneurysms. In addition to this, I was able to participate in other clinical studies and wrote literature reviews for newly proposed studies. This was an experience so unique that introduced me to what it meant to take bench-side work and translate it to bedside - everything we were doing was with the intent of directly serving patients impacted by stroke. The laboratory staff was a pleasure to work with and I keep in close communication with them still, they've been a clear example of mentorship.

To tell you the truth, medicine was never something I thought I could see myself doing, never mind surgery. I still wouldn't say I'm crazy about surgery but there were so many observations during my time with NSSSP that highlighted the importance of underrepresented students going into this field. One moment that sticks with me is when an anesthesiologist commented, "I wonder how much your chances of getting shot increase when you have face tattoos." The patient on the surgical bed was a Latino man, who was clearly in distress, that had been shot in the head and required a cranioplasty. You can't tell me his comments were simply about tattoos. Even if they were, how can we expect this discriminatory bias to not impact the quality of care that he provides for this incredibly vulnerable patient?

Regardless of where my medical journey takes me, I want to ensure that I am an advocate for my patients. In the end, I presented my research to an audience of neurosurgeons and neuroscience research - I knew that the job was far from finished but that moment was incredibly surreal. That opportunity wouldn't have been possible without all of my support systems.

Invigorated by my experience with the SANS Center, I went into my junior year with the mission to continue building an inclusive neuroscience community. That fall, I organized Grey Matters' first Neuroscience Cultural Showcase where we invited cultural performers to share their crafts and relate them to foundational concepts in neuroscience - such as rhythm and sensory perception. At one point, I believed that my cultural identity had to be separate from my ambitions in neuroscience but luckily, I learned that they could work in tandem to invite others that have historically faced barriers to STEM into this space. This was also the year I was accepted into the neuroscience major, proving that despite the comments of my former teacher, I was capable of contributing meaningful work to the field.